Friday, January 27, 2012

Finding the Blessings in the Obstacles

I'm probably overreacting.  I usually do.  However, I just feel like the past couple weeks I have had more setbacks than I'm used to.  This whole ordination process and parenting thing has gone so smoothly for me so far that sometimes I forget that it can't always be that way.  

The past few weeks have included Evelyn's ear infection-turned-bronchial infection, our laptop breaking, and plane tickets home that cost us a whole lot more than expected.  Additionally, since Christmas Evelyn has given up on sleeping through the night, so I'm up at 3:00, 6:00 and 8:00.  

Last night, my gums surrounding the tooth that has been hurting me for the past year or so swelled up.  I'm nearly certain that it's abscessed, which stinks because I don't have insurance.  Then, I woke up this morning to an e-mail that says that I'm a credit and a half short for graduation, which  means I need to take an additional class this semester. 

All of this is so small when I look at the big picture.  But, readers, I'd be lying if I said it's no big deal.  I'm.  So.  Tired.  

Being a mom is hard.  When I list the things I did all day, I think, "Why am I so tired? I hardly did anything." But it's amazing how much energy a baby takes.  Then, while I was taking my J-Term class, I only had her by myself from 1:30 to 4:30 each day, so I kept thinking, "Why am I so tired?"  But it's amazing how much energy a four-hour a day class takes.  When you put them both together, and never really get a break (by the way, how do single moms do it and how on earth did my Mother-in-Law do laundry for eight?), it leads to an overreaction or two.  It makes me cry when I hear that I have to take another class. 

I want to be an optimistic person.  I always try to be positive, but what I'm discovering about myself is that what I really am is an honest person.  I can see the blessings in my obstacles. Evelyn is healthy and happy; our laptop was old anyway; we get to fly home instead of driving and I am delighted to see my family; I get the chance to learn more by taking another class; I'm delighted to get this &#*% tooth out of my mouth.  But I'm also willing to admit and accept that what I'm doing is hard.  Right?  Is that okay?  

Thank you for hearing my little vent.  I always struggle a little bit to figure out what is appropriate to put on this blog.  But, ultimately, I want the people who have a say in the success of my career to know that I'm human.  

Gosh, if I don't post pictures of Evelyn, that would make two posts in a row.  We can't have that.  Here are some photos from Evelyn's play-date today at church.  A few of us decided to get together in the nursery for an hour or two.  We had a blast! 

Lydia takes very good care of Evelyn.  Sweet Henry likes to practice
his Godzilla skills around her, though.  

She dressed Super-Chic

And stopped by the office to hang out with one of
her favorite adoptive Grandmas, Dianne.  



2 comments:

  1. I think you should be able to earn 1 1/2 credits just for finishing up your masters degree while becoming a new mom. You should ask them. Sounds fair to me!!!

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  2. You can do it Joanna! I'm so sorry you just found out about the one and half credits, but I'm sure you'll figure out a way to make it work. Still, you're right it's totally okay to be upset and mad and frustrated about it all. And your tooth--ouch! You'll be in my prayers.

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We don't all have to agree! But we do all have to be respectful! Please, no disrespect here.

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